Life brings unexpected events that shape your perceptions about the inherent design of the universe. Accordingly, your perspective shapes the lens you embody: Is life a series of circumstances that is happening to you (victim of my reality)? Or, is life a manifestation of your thoughts, feelings, and emotions that is happening for you (creator of my reality)?
As we have learned through our experiences, it is not about what happens in your life. Rather, it is about your response to what has happened. Therefore, the lens in which you observe life constructs your reality.
What do I believe?
In order to ascertain your answer, you must delve into your belief structures. What do you believe deeply in the core of your being?
First, a look into both perspectives. What is the difference between the victim-based belief structure (rooted in lack consciousness) and the creator-based belief structure (rooted in abundance conscious)? Read more about these two types of consciousnesses here: https://tracinicolesmith.com/be-conscientious-about-consciousness/
Victim-based belief structure:
- Blaming others as the cause for an undesired event or situation in life
- Denying any personal responsibility for one’s own life
- Believing that other people are more fortunate or luckier
- Feeling empowered through self-pity and sympathy from others
Creator-based belief structure:
- Taking ownership for the reaction to an undesired event of situation in life
- Accepting all personal responsibility for own’s own life
- Believing that everyone has an opportunity to create inner wealth within
- Feeling empowered through self-love and compassion for yourself and others
For example: You are sitting in your office early one morning. To create the perfect tone for the day, you turn on soft piano music from the internet radio. After a while, you notice the chirps of birds on your office window harmonizing with the musical notes floating through the air. In addition, hints of peppermint and lavender dance as they flow out of your essential oil diffuser. Thus, you breathe in peace and calm starting the day off balanced. Overall, the start of the day streams effortlessly as a result of the radiant ambience you’ve designed.
Out of nowhere, your boss enters your office like the Tasmanian Devil. He whirls around as he paces while shouting his head off about the meeting he just left with his bosses. Unknowingly, he displaces his stress onto you and begins to pick apart a report you created.
How do you react?
If you are a victim:
Without blinking, you bark back at your boss and engage in a power struggle. Undoubtedly, you defend your work as you begin to seethe with anger. After he leaves, a wet landscape of tears floods your face. Reaching for your phone to vent to your best friend, you stub your toe on a chair and yell an expletive.
Moreover, as you nearly fall to the ground from sharp pain, you almost drop your phone. As you begin typing, your mind cannot spell out the words fast enough. In spite of your inner pain and swollen toe, your fingers ferociously bang on the digital keyboard of your phone.
At this time, your text messages to your friend convey victim energy: “Can you believe he came into my office and acted crazy? It’s not fair. He ruined my day. I am going to come in late tomorrow to spite him. I am about to go into his office and have it out. I will show him!”
To read more about transmuting your victim consciousness: https://spiritualityhealth.com/blogs/conscious-living/2015/06/30/bianca-alexander-overcoming-tyranny-victimhood-100-accountability
If you are a creator:
After taking a deep breath, you ask your boss to calm down and have a seat. Then, you acknowledge that he had a rough morning. Subsequently, you ask him to tell you what upset him so much. You concede that the report may need some edits, but you also request to defer the report discussion to another time when he has a clear head. Embarrassed, he decides to leave your office to take a walk.
Above all, you remained nonreactive to the situation. Because you saw the opportunity to shift the energy from anger to comfort without allowing the emotional charge from your boss affect your energy, you remained unscathed.
In life, we always have a choice.
While we cannot control what happens to us, we can control how we react. In most cases, nonreaction to circumstances occurs when you have delved within to understand what your triggers are. Deeply diving into the origins of your pain is a worthwhile endeavor.
Liberating yourself from inner pain requires a commitment to journey into darkness. Through sitting in the dark, you learn that your inner light can never be dimmed. Hence, you discover the joy of creating your life through the choices you make rather than believing someone has the power to deny your ability to choose.